I went to school at 1pm for the All Saints Home CIP thing, only for guitar members. We had to go to All Saints Home and perform songs for the elderly and play games with the elderly (something like musical chairs) and be their Santa Claus for a day. I didn't like the sight of the pitiful elderly, looking like they didn't know what's happening and all. My heart went out to them. Lol. But I interacted kinda well with them and one of the elderly kept on pointing at my teeth and saying that my braces are nice and that her daughter also wears it. The other elderly thought that I'm 20 years old; she says that I look so tall. Lol. The CIP ended at 4 plus, and after that, I went for the Trybe Bbq and Christmas gathering.
Not all of the group members came, like Amelin and Stephenie. Nevertheless, we had a great bonding time together. We set up the bbq pit outside the Trybe Center and tried a bit of barbequeing at the pit. There's quite a lot of food; marshmallows, chicken wings, hotdogs, stingray, seafood spaghetti, chocolate fondue, ice-cream, drinks... I was hungry because I didn't have lunch. Luckily, I didn't have the side effects of skipping meals. We ended up eating while the Trybe coaches cooked the food. They kept on saying that we needed food as we're growing girls. Lol. Yeah, the food was nice. =)
After we're really full, we sat down in a circle to have dessert. Chocolate fondue! I can't resist chocolate, so it's really ooh-la-la. And somemore, we had ice-cream after that. In the midst of enjoying dessert, we had christmas talk, like what does christmas mean to you and all. (I have never celebrated Christmas in my life so I told them Christmas means Santa Claus and all? Lol.) Oh yeah, we kept on laughing while talking too. Then we had girl talk, you know. Yeah, it kinda got serious and all. Everyone shared with everyone. And when it was my turn to share, I did something I've never done in a few months. I cried. Lol. Tears were literally flowing down my face like nobody's buisiness. I guess everyone was surprised.
I guess it's the result of keeping it in my heart for quite a long time, and pretending that I've moved on and trying to ignore it and acting like I don't care...and going to the gym trying to vent out bottled feelings and forcing myself not to eat instead. I am not really good at speaking to people about these things, so I was literally telling my group members in bits and pieces, while crying. Lol. Something told me to let it all out to them, and I think I tried my best to tell them what really troubled me. How I wish it was mind-boggling science/maths problems troubling me. Lol. I was quite enlightened after they talked with me and told me a lot of things and all. Lol, and I was still crying? Damn it, it was embarrassing. Lol.
It ended at 11pm+, real late. But I guess everyone really shared a lot and we learnt a lot from one another and gave and received lots of meaningful words. And we had a good time together. I think we're closer than before? Lol.
I guess I'm still venting it out at the gym, not all of the bottles are emptied yet. Shake your head and say that I'm hopeless. Dang.