heart on wings

{Thursday, October 12, 2006}

It's a bit surprising realizing how all of a sudden, I'm not sitting on my chair and looking at all those piles of notes and textbooks. After like a month of crazy studying and being a near-perfect nerd, I'm desperately deprived! I've lost my freedom, the freedom to do whatever things I like. So from today onwards, I'm gonna treasure every single day, every single hour, and do the things I do! (See, I'm soooo deprived.)

Retail Therapy.
Reading storybooks.
Relaxing.
Having girly fun.
Having family fun.
Sleeping.
Singing.
Swimming.

Spring-cleaning.
Writing poems.
Watching videos/movies.

Watching sunset at the beach.
Playing computer games.
Playing music.

Exercising.
Ice-skating.
Dancing.
Dreaming.


These are some of the things I wanna do during the holidays. I know I stink of desperateness. C'mon, I make you study for morning till night for 30 days and see what will happen to you. Haha.

Time does really pass. Suddenly I'm sitting here and relaxing. A few days ago, (no, today), yeah today, I survived my last paper. Literature. And straight after, I changed into home clothes and went alone on the train to City Hall. This is seriously the first time I boarded the train myself, without anyone else accompanying me. It was a weird, new feeling. Okay, this may sound like a daily thing to some, but definitely not me. Okay, I sound like a pampered kid. Lol. And I met Cindy, Xiao Ting and Amelin at Marina Square without getting lost/disturbed. We spent the whole day at Marina Square, singing karaoke and window-shopping. It felt weird. It's like I was frantically putting pressure on the school table, writing like crazy and suddenly, I found myself singing, and window-shopping. Lol. It's like HUH? and WOW! Okay, this doesn't make sense.

Looking back on the long and arduous learning journey, many many things have happened and I have learnt many many things. Many tears have been shed and many emotions swirled. Many events unfolded and many setbacks too. And all of the above was due to the overload of work. Work work work. Teachers like to spice up our lives. And study study study. English Chinese E Maths A Maths Biology Chemistry Physics History Social Studies Literature. OVERWHELMING. Teaches always say study makes your future brighter, but will all the things we study be relevant to what we do in the future? Or is studying just a method of grading students? The first week of mugging, tension became my friend. It gave me sharp pains at my neck whenever I finish a paper. It's like damn. Loss of appetite at appropriate eating times happened too. And weird cravings countered it. Damn, I need to get a weighing machine and weigh my heavy self! During the weeks of mugging, I told myself. Okay, remember, the day will finally come where you can sit in front of the computer and type like mad, to make up for the many days not spent updating on my darling blog. And now, it's finally happening.

Damn, my fingers are like swollen due to the everyday grip of the blue pen. My brain, is dense now. Heavy with much knowledge. But I fear, that I may not do well for all the papers even though I studied real hard for them. It's just this little fear that I have, and you know, I have accurate sixth sense and I really fear getting back all my papers. I know this kinda feeling sucks and I know I should not have it, but it comes nibbling my heart and I can't ignore it. Aww, please don't make it come true. Lol.

I shall stop myself from thinking about all these and conjure up a holiday plan that includes all the activities and all the things I should do during this big holiday. YAY BABY, HOLIDAYS ARE COMING BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just wanna let you know, the hiatus is officially over. =))))))))))))))))))))))))



The korean drama music video above is very very ROMANTIC. So romantic, it's surreal. Oh yeah, add picking flowers and walking under trees with leaves falling to my holiday plan. I need some doses of romance. =)

I'm gonna make full use of the coming holidays so that I would not regret it next year. Next year! Damn, O Levels are coming. I need to enjoy as much as I can, and sadly, full blast ahead next year. I wanna do as many things as I can and I wanna learn many skills and I wanna do all sorts of crazy things!

Okay, I'm tired now, I need to recharge, because I woke up at 7am today when everyone else's is asleep, for my final Literature revision, and now, the stupid strain in my neck is hurting. Good night and many hugs and kissies! =)

9:58 PM;

be with myself

Affirmation

cappucino on a rainy day,
snuggles in the warmth of blankets,
hot food in the arms of hunger,
huge umbrella of a stranger,
embraces in the rain,
smiles amidst frowns,
sincerity..
triumphs and singing of the heart

in center

clarity


Raindrops like candlewax
Drowning in a
Solid sculpture, you Burning and cold.

peace

Independence
Health
Baking skills
Yoga/Electone lessons
Love
Faith
Happiness

serenity.


*HUGS* TOTAL! *HUGGIES* snuggles & cuddles

.::.

Cousin
amelin =)
fiona =)
ke*hua =)
edwin =)
sim*yee =)
yi*chen =)
anna =)
♥ trains


.::.

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Credits: momotea, larafairie.
Images: Foto decadent, deviantart.
Since 31st March'06
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